But who gets to say we have a gripe this game, but when our opponents say it, they don't have a gripe? It's human nature to remember the ones that went against you, but discredit the ones that went for you.
that brush you're painting with is way, way too wide.
Look, agree somewhat with your premise. Blaming officials is eye-roll inducing. Everyone does it, it's a cliche. But let me ask you: are fans that blame refs wrong 100% of the time?
Were Kings fans wrong to cry about the officials in the 2002 playoffs, after what we found out later from Donaghy?
Maybe it's only 1 out of 1000, but sometimes the fans are right: there were enough blown calls to influence the outcome of the game, and they all or virtually all went against one team and in the other team's favor. Could be incompetence. Could be corruption. Could be personal animosity/bias. None of that is really rare in the human experience.
Last night my fear was either Fox or Bam would get 2 quick ones and be out for an extended period. I wish! It wasn't just the calls that went against us, it was also calls against UNC where there was no whistle. Easy peasy to impact the outcome of a 2 point game. And everyone who says 'well, we got those guys back, and even built a lead, so no impact' is missing the point. First, we might have been well ahead in the game if those 4 guys aren't watching. Instead of being ahead by 5 with 5 to go, maybe we're up 14. Second, it's vitally important in offense to develop a rythm. Some teams intentionally 'muddy up' a game just for that reason, to get offensive players out of rythm. Once you're out of sorts, often you can't change that mid-game.
As for your question, the answer of "who gets to say" is easy - what do disinterested observers say? Show me the Louisville loss to Kentucky that resulted in multiple national columnists and broadcasters questioning the officiating, and I'll say, perhaps so, maybe this is their 1 out of 1000....