Why sit at the bar and talk to some meat bag when you can grab a table where some broad will serve you.
How To Not Annoy Your Bartender/Get Drinks In A Timely Fashion
- Thread starter roguemocha
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Why sit at the bar and talk to some meat bag when you can grab a table where some broad will serve you.
@DSmith21I guess the bars you frequent arent't nice enough and don't pull in enough business to allow their bartenders comp tabs? Both bars I work at do and believe it or not sometimes we'll(the bartenders or managers) buy people's entire tabs when they're cool and a regular.
Sorry the shitholes you can afford aren't able to do that."Waits ten minutes, realizes he's never getting served and leaves with tail between legs." That's if I'm in a good mood.
We both win!
No, lost my tail a while back.@DSmith21I guess the bars you frequent arent't nice enough and don't pull in enough business to allow their bartenders comp tabs? Both bars I work at do and believe it or not sometimes we'll(the bartenders or managers) buy people's entire tabs when they're cool and a regular.
"Waits ten minutes, realizes he's never getting served and leaves with tail between legs." That's if I'm in a good mood.
This is what the waters are for...bartender should respect the importance of h2o
Water is irrelevant if you're drinking a couple doubles an hour. Doesn't matter how much water you suck down, you're going to get drunk, albeit less hungover hopefully.
@DSmith21I guess the bars you frequent arent't nice enough and don't pull in enough business to allow their bartenders comp tabs? Both bars I work at do and believe it or not sometimes we'll(the bartenders or managers) buy people's entire tabs when they're cool and a regular.
As long as you are doing it out of your pocket or with your employer's knowledge/permission, I have no problem with "over pours" or comping. I just know a lot of bars and restaurants that have failed because their staff's pilfering in the way you describe. Here is an answer to both employee theft and a bartenders with bad attitudes:
When does your list come out about how to get your bedpan changed quickly, Papa Murse?
That's a lot of bitching for one post.
You want 12? You get 12.
12. Don't ask about the whole mixing of alcohols and "beer before liquor never been sicker" BS. That is some high school rhyme that 17 year olds tell 15 yeard olds to sound wise but doesn't mean anything. If you usually only drink a couple drinks at dinner or on the weekend because you normally have to be in your cute little grey cubicle in the middle of Whogivesashitville, USA at 7-8am the next morning and you decide to drink like island local one or two nights on vacation, you're going to feel like crap. It doesn't matter if its all beer, or vodka or whiskey, if you drink a bunch of anything and you're not used to it, it will suck.
I typically don't not tip at bars, but since the result is getting to keep my money and the only consequence is getting made fun of by wanks that bartend for a living and guys that sit at the bar, I might stop.
Agreed.This is also a reason why you should NEVER start a bar unless you've bartended before or have a bartender/bar manager you trust implicitly. Bartenders are put in a position where stealing is easy and tempting. If you can't trust your staff or don't know how to quickly spot someone stealing then don't open a bar. Also a good reason to give them a comp tab. You can at least write that off and it counts toward inventory numbers.As long as you are doing it out of your pocket or with your employer's knowledge/permission, I have no problem with "over pours" or comping. I just know a lot of bars and restaurants that have failed because their staff's pilfering in the way you describe. Here is an answer to both employee theft and a bartenders with bad attitudes:
Robot bartender would be awful.I love the back and forth with a good, witty bartender. And even moreso with that type of customer. Although most customers that think they are witty or funny are awful (see KSR callers). Haven't had but a couple patrons that could match me when we start busting balls or talking sports but when it happens I'm definitely buying a round.
Is it classier to get drunk at a bar instead of at your house? Feels like it would be cheaper to be at home and drink. If you get drunk at home is that seen as an alcoholic type move? What's the official rules on this?
I just dream of going in to a bar wearing military gear, drinking alone while acting erratic like I'm trying to process something but I might snap if you try and talk to me.
ICU doesn't typically deal with patients that can use a bedpan so you'll have to wait and ask a floor nurse. Sorry.
Oh no guys, going to have to change my lifestyle up a bit financially. Looks like I won't be getting that $4 from @crazyqx83 once every two weeks anymore....
Bullcrap. I've been in the field 25 years. I bet 50 -75% of ICU patients do not have foley caths.
CCU maybe when they come out of surgery. but not ICU.
How To Not Annoy Your Sandwich Artist/Get Lunch In A Timely Fashion
Keep in mind this pertains to a high volume, full service Subway.
1. Don't tell me your name unless I ask. There's like 12 people in line here, I won't even try to remember unless you're really cool/interesting or tip well.
2. Don't order salads for everyone. I'm busy, I don't need busy work and I don't need to make 5 salads when only you want one. Also, if you order a salad, touching eat it.
3. Know what you're eating. This goes for everyone in your group order. Don't flag me down and then say, "Ummmm I'll have a....what's good?" It's Subway- nothing is "good". If you don't know what you want, just ask for a meatball sub or whateverthetouch and eat that til you decide. It's just A sandwich, not your last sandwich.
4. Know what you're eating, part 2. If you ask for that one sub you had that one time at the Penn Station or something at Quizno's or wherever the last place you acted like a jackass was, guess what? I don't know their sandwich menu. Furthermore, if you're from god forbid, the Midwest or wherever and they have some sub called a Yellow Thunder Pecker in southwest Wisconsin, I PROBABLY don't know what's in that because I would never live there. So when you ask for one and I say, "I don't know what's in that, but I'd be happy to make one for you though. What's in it?", don't you dare look at me and say, "I don't know, you're the sandwich artist." You're 25+, know what you're consuming, you half-grown baby man.
5. Don't order 7 different oven baked subs. I have to bake every goddamn one of those and that takes forever. Now you're just wasting everyone's time and I promise, you're not that important. Order one, MAYBE two different oven baked subs. I don't care that Tammy doesn't like green peppers or that Steffany, spelled with two goddamn "F's", just can't do black olives. She can pick the next sandwich.
6. Don't split six inch subs. THIS IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I'm not explaining this. Order a WHOLE sandwich or don't.
7. Don't bring kids in to sit at the Subway. Actually, do. We have kids meals and appreciate your business.
8. Don't say you don't want a food or drink menu and then proceed to ask me what we have. And if it's because you "didn't bring your readers" well gramps, maybe it's a little late for you to eat lunch/early for you to eat dinner, isn't it.
9. Don't ask the price of everything on the menu. First of all, it's on the menu. Secondly, if you have to ask you probably shouldn't be at the bar spending $4+ on a mediocre cold cut sandwich. I'm not going to give you the same deal Wimpy got from the hamburger place. This is Subway.
10. Don't pay 6 ways for one group order. You're all friends, that's why you're out picking up lunch. Two people, preferably one buy the damn lunch order and call it a day. Then rotate for the next week or settle up at the office, pretty simple. When I have to spend 2 minutes running and printing 6 different CC receipts and then at some point putting them in the system, well, everyone else is waiting for lunch while you're busy being a poor.
11. Finally, if you even think about whistling I will take your sandwich, dump it on the floor, stab you with the little knife I have to use on ALL the subs, and present you with your credit card receipt so fast it'll already be showing up on your iPhone wallet app before you even sign it. Honestly don't even wave at me. I'll be there when I finish what I'm doing. Do you wave at the tender at the bar while you're in line to let her know you need something?
Customers are the reason most good sandwich artists are backed up 9 out of 10 times. If you take 5 minutes to order, then everyone else at the 'Way is having to wait those 5 minutes as well. So do me and your fellow patrons a favor, follow these rules and I'm sure you'll be well on your way to poor decisions, other than your choice for lunch, handing me plenty of your hard earned cash and finally blacking out.
Don't thank me now, just hand me some cash when you come in for lunch this Thursday.
Keep in mind this pertains to a high volume, full service Subway.
1. Don't tell me your name unless I ask. There's like 12 people in line here, I won't even try to remember unless you're really cool/interesting or tip well.
2. Don't order salads for everyone. I'm busy, I don't need busy work and I don't need to make 5 salads when only you want one. Also, if you order a salad, touching eat it.
3. Know what you're eating. This goes for everyone in your group order. Don't flag me down and then say, "Ummmm I'll have a....what's good?" It's Subway- nothing is "good". If you don't know what you want, just ask for a meatball sub or whateverthetouch and eat that til you decide. It's just A sandwich, not your last sandwich.
4. Know what you're eating, part 2. If you ask for that one sub you had that one time at the Penn Station or something at Quizno's or wherever the last place you acted like a jackass was, guess what? I don't know their sandwich menu. Furthermore, if you're from god forbid, the Midwest or wherever and they have some sub called a Yellow Thunder Pecker in southwest Wisconsin, I PROBABLY don't know what's in that because I would never live there. So when you ask for one and I say, "I don't know what's in that, but I'd be happy to make one for you though. What's in it?", don't you dare look at me and say, "I don't know, you're the sandwich artist." You're 25+, know what you're consuming, you half-grown baby man.
5. Don't order 7 different oven baked subs. I have to bake every goddamn one of those and that takes forever. Now you're just wasting everyone's time and I promise, you're not that important. Order one, MAYBE two different oven baked subs. I don't care that Tammy doesn't like green peppers or that Steffany, spelled with two goddamn "F's", just can't do black olives. She can pick the next sandwich.
6. Don't split six inch subs. THIS IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I'm not explaining this. Order a WHOLE sandwich or don't.
7. Don't bring kids in to sit at the Subway. Actually, do. We have kids meals and appreciate your business.
8. Don't say you don't want a food or drink menu and then proceed to ask me what we have. And if it's because you "didn't bring your readers" well gramps, maybe it's a little late for you to eat lunch/early for you to eat dinner, isn't it.
9. Don't ask the price of everything on the menu. First of all, it's on the menu. Secondly, if you have to ask you probably shouldn't be at the bar spending $4+ on a mediocre cold cut sandwich. I'm not going to give you the same deal Wimpy got from the hamburger place. This is Subway.
10. Don't pay 6 ways for one group order. You're all friends, that's why you're out picking up lunch. Two people, preferably one buy the damn lunch order and call it a day. Then rotate for the next week or settle up at the office, pretty simple. When I have to spend 2 minutes running and printing 6 different CC receipts and then at some point putting them in the system, well, everyone else is waiting for lunch while you're busy being a poor.
11. Finally, if you even think about whistling I will take your sandwich, dump it on the floor, stab you with the little knife I have to use on ALL the subs, and present you with your credit card receipt so fast it'll already be showing up on your iPhone wallet app before you even sign it. Honestly don't even wave at me. I'll be there when I finish what I'm doing. Do you wave at the tender at the bar while you're in line to let her know you need something?
Customers are the reason most good sandwich artists are backed up 9 out of 10 times. If you take 5 minutes to order, then everyone else at the 'Way is having to wait those 5 minutes as well. So do me and your fellow patrons a favor, follow these rules and I'm sure you'll be well on your way to poor decisions, other than your choice for lunch, handing me plenty of your hard earned cash and finally blacking out.
Don't thank me now, just hand me some cash when you come in for lunch this Thursday.
Who tips a male bartender?? GTFO. I never tip a male bartender, and usually wait for a female to get free. She gets 2 bucks on every drink served, as far as a dude, get a real job.
![[cheers]](https://ct.yimg.com/mr/uploads/891/5628.gif "Cheers [cheers]")
Neuro ICU???? Ummm, EVERYONE there is basically unconcsious, brain dead or sedated.
Don't you bartend in key west? I think we all know why rogue makes decent "tips," if ya knowhatimean, amirite fellas?
I always laughed at the person ordering a fruity frozen girly drink then complaining there is not enough alcohol in it.
I witnessed a lady once ordered five different flavored drinks at a restaurant the sent them all back saying she didn't care for it. She ended up getting a L.I.T. I can't go to the grocery and try five different beers and then say I don't like them and not pay for them. You take a chance
I witnessed a lady once ordered five different flavored drinks at a restaurant the sent them all back saying she didn't care for it. She ended up getting a L.I.T. I can't go to the grocery and try five different beers and then say I don't like them and not pay for them. You take a chance
Just be forewarned, drinking at home will forever ruin public drinking for you.
Homepours are where it's at and are the equivalent of a 10 dollar drink at your local shitty pub. It's expensive getting drunk in public.
. Guys, listen up we're all learning here.
But who the hell wants to get drunk at home while watching your wife do the housework? Not me.
Rogue: "Hey sir, what are ya having today?
Oldsports: "GTFO and send me over a female to take my order. Here, give her $2 bucks too".
![[eyeroll]](http://l.yimg.com/j/assets/img/emoticons/rolleye/rolleye0011.r191677.gif "Eye roll [eyeroll]")
I don't drink beer as much anymore, because the carbonation ****s me up, so my go to drinks are bourbon on the rocks, whiskey sour and old fashioned. Whiskey sours are easy enough to make, but this time of year I like old fashioneds (not sure how to pluralize that) and I sure as shit ain't making that mess at home.
I guess it all depends on what your wife looks like...
Bar Tenders Hate Him!
Roguemocha reveals the service industries twelve secret tricks. Click here for more.
Roguemocha reveals the service industries twelve secret tricks. Click here for more.
rogue really seems like an attention-seeker with sociopathic tendencies.
Customer service may not be the best line of work for you. If you are expecting people to walk into a bar (or any place of business) and stop acting like people, you are going to be sorely disappointed.
I'd say it's even money that rogue and BlueBallsSean are the same poster.
now if only my doctor would pour me a drink while teaching me about reproductive biology. i'd definitely tip her well. but you know, just the tip.
- Do not introduce yourself.
- Do not order water.
- Do not talk to me until you are sure you know what you want to order.
- Do not ask me what is good.
- Do not ask me to make something unless (a) you know how to make it yourself, or (b) it is an easy generic drink that can be quickly made.
- Do not order different types of shots. I don't care if some people like different things.
- Do not ask the price of your purchase. Just pay it, and tip me 20% of whatever I say you owe.
- Do not pay for only your drinks. Pay for your entire group or don't order anything.
- Do not under any circumstances attempt to get my attention.
![[laughing]](http://l.yimg.com/j/assets/img/emoticons/classic/laugh.r191677.gif "Laughing [laughing]")
I mean, seriously, F*CK YOU person who fetches my drink.
Really #5 most bartenders that don't know a drink they Google it or use an app. Seen ones that don't know how to make a Margarita without a mix.
Not remotely close, I give no touches about politics.
And @_Chase_ Ill f*ck you on your drinks and make you feel stupid in front of your group right back til you leave or ask for a manager that will laugh about you in the back but pretend he's really mad.
One of the best things about being a bartender is having the ability to talk down/make fun of someone without saying anything they can legitimately get mad about.
I can understand your frustration. But remember who is paying for service and who is working for pay.
Service workers love to talk about their patrons having a sense of entitlement, but one thing most people won't talk about, are the servers and bartenders having a sense of entitlement.
If you really listen to their bitching, what you'll actually hear is...Do you have any idea how difficult it is to listen to someone ask for a drink, and then I have to go and get a bottle from a few feet away, pour it into a glass, and hand it to them? And if that isn't enough, I have to do that a bunch of times every night.
If you really listen to their bitching, what you'll actually hear is...Do you have any idea how difficult it is to listen to someone ask for a drink, and then I have to go and get a bottle from a few feet away, pour it into a glass, and hand it to them? And if that isn't enough, I have to do that a bunch of times every night.
You seem to think I give a shit about what the bartender or bar manager thinks about my alcohol knowledge. I can assure you that literally nothing could be further from the truth.
If I went to your bar, or one like it, here's reality.
Man, that bartender is kind of a dick. Yeah, let's go someplace else next time. Cool. Let me just pay the tab and lets get out of here.
**Tips reasonably in spite of self-important bartender because assumption is they need it more than I do.**
We don't go back there, and really don't ever even think about the experience again. There is no animosity, there is just a nothingness. You do not and did not ever exist in our consciousness. The only reason we crossed paths is because you're the gatekeeper to the drinks. If patrons were allowed to grab their own beers like they can fill their own drinks at McDonald's, then you'd be out on your ass, living in a van down by the river, pouring pruno for the other miscreants that could easily be replaced by robots.
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