Wasn't gonna post a vacation rundown but this thing's practically dead so here goes. Don't even feel bad for the long form. It took me all of 30 minutes to catch up on a week of gyero on the plane ride back home.
Kauai last week for the second time. I'd pack it all up and move there in a heartbeat if it was at all reasonably feasible.
-Flight out of bluegrass, everything looks on time... then we are at the check in desk at the gate and the girl informs us that our O'Hare connection is delayed and we've been rebooked... with a now 22 hour layover in Chicago. Called the airline immediately, no help from the first two reps... the key is to keep using the word "unacceptable" and be polite. They eventually put us on another airline and got us there 20 minutes ahead of schedule. Much better than the 23 hours late they originally offered.
-Wife's friend (nurse from residency) who has a cousin living on the island was there visiting at the same time. Hung out with them quite a bit. The cousin has the life. He does landscaping and side jobs for the people with $8-10+ million houses and surfs and hikes when he isn't working.
-Went on several hikes with the guy off the beaten path. I didn't know I was scared of heights but it's apparently a fear that just hadn't been adequately tested yet. Walking on dirt paths with steep 500 foot drop offs 2 feet on either side will test you. Props to the wife for being a trooper and doing it all. Of course her friend that was with us, who deems herself an outdoors person, calls Kauai her "second home" and tries way too hard to fit in with the locals, couldn't begin to keep up. Then as we're driving back from Waimea canyon, he tells me to turn on this little dirt road. "Does this jeep have 4 wheel drive?" "Yeah, I think all jeeps do." "Ok good. Hope the spare tire is good too bc there's no phone service anywhere close to here." "Uhhh... sure. Touch it." Go on this 20 minute drive basically in the jungle, occasionally on something resembling a path, getting stuck in mud a handful times and nearly cracking an axle... then take another hike and emerge in the GD middle of the canyon on a little land island in the sky surrounded by nothing but steep drop offs to certain death. Stunningly beautiful. And the little goats who just walk along these steep cliffs like it's nothing crack me up.
-Kayaked the Napali coast. If you don't know what that is look up a picture. 17 mile all day journey in the ocean. Amazing.
-Hiked to and swam in several waterfalls, visited several beaches, took a helicopter ride... the works, really.
-God bless modern swimsuits and retailers for pushing them. And again, props to the wife, for not critiquing every girl that walked by. Nothing says "I'm insecure" like the chicks you could overhear saying "that's not a swimsuit, that's bedroom lingerie. Put some clothes on." Shut up and let the hussies huss.
-Awesome food the whole time, and due to all the physical stuff we did I actually lost weight during the trip.
-Fantasized about moving and got on Zillow just for fun. Typical 2BR 2BA 1000 square foot house a mile from the beach... about 2 million. Dammit.
-Don't understand the people who travel halfway around the world, go to one of the most naturally beautiful places that exists, and bury their heads in their iPad with headphones in next to the resort pool with their back turned from the mountains.
-Til inflation