Men who chose to not have children, how did it go?

[warrior-cat]

No kids. My wife thought I would change my mind at some point but I never did. I always told my wife that if she wants a kid for a while, any one of her sisters would be more than happy to loan us one of theirs. I jokingly...sort of...keep telling the nieces/nephews that if I out live my wife, I'm leaving whatever is left when I die to the one I like the most. I've made it easy on some of them and told them they don't have a chance so they can continue with their sour couldn't care less attitudes. 😁

A piece of advice, if you are unsure about having kids, then wait until you are sure what you want to do.

I doubt your superior alien DNA would mix with our neolithic genomes. Which is why you probably have not tried to procreate. That or, you don't know where to stick it.

 

[Ron Mehico]

Ah I haven't seen that, interesting. Maybe the other thing is that some women literally just want to be a stay at home mom, but we basically told them they can't. And not to mention society looks down on it. But I have a buddy who just the other day was telling me that his wife mentioned she would be totally fine being a stay at home mom. It's a common feeling for a lot of women.

My wife would kill to be a stay at home mom, that would be her dream. Would be great for our kids and I could probably name the benefits to our family for 15 mins. Unfortunately with today’s society it’s almost impossible to live on just a single income.

 

[bigblueinsanity]

If you're making it a financial analysis, it will never justify kids but thats also missing the point. Nothing is ever more rewarding even if biologically they arent yours. Doesn't mean they aren't expensive, time consuming, or challenging; but that isnt the point.

 

[downw/ball-lineD]

This is something I’ve been thinking about for a while. I’m 34, been on the fence but thought if I met someone and got married, maybe 1 child. But today I realized how much easier life is without them and that I’m out on being a future father.

It’s no secret the COL in America continues to rise. You either grind to be able to buy a house a house and have the American dream with 2 kids and an SUV. Or you simply walk away and live an easier life. I find a lot of women around my age don’t want kids so dating isn’t a huge deal.

Any man out there choose to not have kids and regret it?

Have 4 kids! Best thing I have ever done. Wish I could have more but wife says no. Tried to talk her into adoption. No go. Wish I could freeze time. They grow up so fast. Got a pretty late start. 50yo with 17, 15, 10& 5yo. 1 girl. 3 boys. Love every second. Used to b very independent. Now. Not sure I ever want to be alone. I love them being around all the time.

 

[FirewithFire]

I think a huge issue is modern women. Tatted up or the boss bitch type. Very promiscuous, usually liberal. A lot of it is against what the modern man wants in a wife/mother of his kids

There is more truth here than most are willing to admit. These women are called Alpha Widows. I'm not going into that subject any deeper because it sure to start a thread slide that will end in an avalanche. It is real and it is crippling relationships among young people.

It is also important to realize that society has had a massive shift in the last eighty years or so from agrarian, to production, and now this crap show service economy.

My dad had nine brothers and sisters. Was it because my grandma loved being perpetually pregnant? No, it was because they needed kids to work the farm and they had to build in redundancy. That's right, if a couple died you had extra. None of his brothers of sisters had more than four kids. Of those kids, I can't think of many that had more than two. Many have none.

The need for a large family isn't there anymore. In fact, it is punitive in many ways.

 

[ukalum1988]

I’m 59, with two sons, 24 and 21. Got married at 28; wife and I struggled with fertility issues and were considering adoption when we got pregnant with our first. Our second was also a wonderful surprise. Four kids would have been awesome but with my wife’s problems with pregnancy (both were premature) I knew we were done after the second.

Children are a blessing but if you know it’s not for you then don’t have them. I have a cousin a few years younger than me who’s been married nearly as long as I have but he and his wife never had children. As far as I can tell they seem happy. Another cousin didn’t get married until he was 52; his wife had two kids from a previous marriage. He’s 65 now and enjoying the retired life as a step grandparent.

There’s really no wrong way to go about it as long as you’re content and satisfied with your life choices.

 

[Nightwish84]

I think a huge issue is modern women. Tatted up or the boss bitch type. Very promiscuous, usually liberal. A lot of it is against what the modern man wants in a wife/mother of his kids

It's Christmas so I'm going to be as kind as I can be here - the above sounds like something an incel would say. Incels are usually younger guys who think they know the world, or what the "modern man" needs, and they usually have an odd dislike of women their own age. Incels see most women as "bitches" and/or "sluts." I don't think believing modern women are tatted up lib bitch whores is a healthy way to go through life but that's just me.

I know on a male dominated, nearly extinct site like this we like doing the whole, "ah hens, they drive us crazy, right?" thing but you're 34, slow down on thinking you know what modern men want and who modern women are.

 

[btodd0224]

I’m 120 and been married twice, one daughter with my 2nd wife. Have 12 kids with other women while I was single. 4 sets of twins and 4 single, spent a lot of time watching games and activities in the upper areas of events, so I didn’t upset their mom’s. Expensive, would be an understatement, but worth every minute. Even if I never got to see them on holidays, birthdays or as much as I wanted.

Have all of them and my grandkids together for the first time tomorrow. I just hope I can remember most of their names. It’s not easy when there’s 40 or so total.

Hopefully, I can’t have anymore or find out I have any I wasn’t aware of. I already have grandkids older than my youngest daughter, she’s 8.

 

[ukalum1988]

I’m 120 and been married twice, one daughter with my 2nd wife. Have 12 kids with other women while I was single. 4 sets of twins and 4 single, spent a lot of time watching games and activities in the upper areas of events, so I didn’t upset their mom’s. Expensive, would be an understatement, but worth every minute. Even if I never got to see them on holidays, birthdays or as much as I wanted.

Have all of them and my grandkids together for the first time tomorrow. I just hope I can remember most of their names. It’s not easy when there’s 40 or so total.

Hopefully, I can’t have anymore or find out I have any I wasn’t aware of. I already have grandkids older than my youngest daughter, she’s 8.

Cool story bro

 

[Joey Rupption]

“One of the nice things God does, is that he doesn't let people who don't have kids know what they're missing."

 

[Rebelfreedomeagle]

slow down on thinking you know what modern men want and who modern women are.

I have a son and a daughter who have both talked about not knowing if they want to be parents or not so I’ve put quite a lot of thought into the issue. My daughter would likely be an incels nightmare because I’ve made sure she’s prepared for whatever life she decides she wants. I’ve put a big focus on personal finance, auto and home ownership, etc so she won’t ever feel she has to rely on someone else. It’s expected that I teach my son these things but not when it comes to daughters. That seems odd to me.

BTW, all my kids know that the most important thing to me is that they have fulfilling and happy lives, nothing more, nothing less.

 

[UKWildcats1987]

I've got one 6 year old and sometimes that's one too many. Currently refusing to go to sleep. Merry Xmas indeed.

 

[JumperJack]

I've got one 6 year old and sometimes that's one too many. Currently refusing to go to sleep. Merry Xmas indeed.

lol. Soak it up Santa, while you can,

 

[CaptainBoogerBuns]

It's Christmas so I'm going to be as kind as I can be here - the above sounds like something an incel would say. Incels are usually younger guys who think they know the world, or what the "modern man" needs, and they usually have an odd dislike of women their own age. Incels see most women as "bitches" and/or "sluts." I don't think believing modern women are tatted up lib bitch whores is a healthy way to go through life but that's just me.

I know on a male dominated, nearly extinct site like this we like doing the whole, "ah hens, they drive us crazy, right?" thing but you're 34, slow down on thinking you know what modern men want and who modern women are.

I can guarantee you Drew is the furthest thing from an incel.

 

[Rex Kwon Do]

lol. Soak it up Santa, while you can,

Have 3 kids and this is our first year post-Santa reveal, and it’s a punch in the gut.

Incredibly exciting to see how they’re growing up, but part of me wishes I could stop or slow time….and that’s not possible unfortunately.

 

[bcw1029]

Personally embrace the simple living lifestyle. Love to travel and have the freedom to do whatever the F I want when I want which includes not raising kids in this shitty, chaotic, and often unpredictable world. Don’t like myself that much where I want to replicate myself. Never once regretted it. In fact, the older I get the more we realize it’s the right choice. Too expensive to raise kids these days. Could care less about an insignificant “legacy.”

Dogs >>>>>>kids. TS