engagement rings

[BankerCat12]

I knew I would catch crap for my post but it's the truth. Not going to throw figures around but I'm not talking about a $1000 ring appraising for $2000. What would Gumer care what it would appraise for... I didn't buy it from them? I would be an idiot getting excited for it appraising for double if I purchased it from them.

Haha at diamond pinkie ring. Only way I can describe it but not what you are thinking. Very small ring that has tiny diamonds all the way around. Not a piece of rock sitting on the band.

 

[august-west]

I own a small family owned jewelry store in western ky and let me tell you there have been a lot stupid ass comments and/or a lot of guys lying about what they've paid. 4,000.00 for a 1/2 carat? What bullshit.

Here is my advise. Figure out what you can afford at this time. Shop around and see what the best deal you can get for that amount. Color and clarity are the two most important aspects IMO. A really nice and clean 1/2 carat, IMO, is much better than crappy 3/4ct. Round/princess cut are going to show more "fire" than other cuts. Don't be persuaded by all the ads you see on tv for "hearts on fire" or whatever the big chains are pushing because trust me when she shows her friends they won't know if it is a media creation or not. I can sell you a diamond that is just as good as one of the "name" diamonds and you can't tell the difference.

I'll leave you with this. I once had a discussion with a female friend and she said she wouldn't accept anything less than a carat engagement ring. I asked her if she would rather have a near flawless and great color 1/2 carart or a yellow carbon filled carat.....made her change her mind.

Buy the best diamond you can afford and 10 years down the road upgrade it.

 

[ymmot31]

The guy that appraises jewelry, also sells jewelry. Might have an incentive to judge a little high. Maybe not.

Got my wife a .5 carat, round, vvs1,G, and paid $2400. Got it from a place in AL that deals in a lot of estate jewelry. I picked the stone from some loose ones and he set it while I waited.

How much do the chains mark up diamonds? Check out the place at the corner of Hourstbourne and Taylorsville rd.

 

[d2atTech]

Originally posted by august-west:
I own a small family owned jewelry store in western ky and let me tell you there have been a lot stupid ass comments and/or a lot of guys lying about what they've paid. 4,000.00 for a 1/2 carat? What bullshit.

Here is my advise. Figure out what you can afford at this time. Shop around and see what the best deal you can get for that amount. Color and clarity are the two most important aspects IMO. A really nice and clean 1/2 carat, IMO, is much better than crappy 3/4ct. Round/princess cut are going to show more "fire" than other cuts. Don't be persuaded by all the ads you see on tv for "hearts on fire" or whatever the big chains are pushing because trust me when she shows her friends they won't know if it is a media creation or not. I can sell you a diamond that is just as good as one of the "name" diamonds and you can't tell the difference.

I'll leave you with this. I once had a discussion with a female friend and she said she wouldn't accept anything less than a carat engagement ring. I asked her if she would rather have a near flawless and great color 1/2 carart or a yellow carbon filled carat.....made her change her mind.

Buy the best diamond you can afford and 10 years down the road upgrade it.

im in san francisco, but i'd be happy to support a family run business over zales or the big name dealers. i'm going to check out the diamond district in s.f. this coming week to take a look at stones. i'll keep in mind the clarity and color bits!

 

[ThroughBlue]

Originally posted by Joey Rupption:

Originally posted by ThroughBlue:
I will add that was a very Christian thing for you to do to break down my life.


I'm not a Christian which doesn't make me a bad person and I certainly do not judge people like you. That is something that I will definitely pass on to my child. Hopefully you do the same to yours.

I will teach my kids to judge anyone who is willfully on the dole as a "loser" from an early age. That way, they'll know who to avoid in life, and why they should set goals in life.

Why would I care if your kind judged me?

How and why would fecal mite judge a Pegasus?

What would be the point of caring about that from either perspective?

Your self righteousness amazes me.

 

[Dennis Reynolds]

Two things:

1) I honestly don't understand why anyone would actually say how much they spent on a ring. Whether it's $25 or $25k or $2.5m, you just sound like a dick talking about it.

2) OP - bump the brakes buddy. SERIOUSLY. You met this chick like 2-3 months ago. You knew she was the "right girl" within the firs few hours?

Ummmm, yeah, FALSE. Go watch Gone Girl. Or read it. The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

 

[ymmot31]

The guy asked for advice, I gave it to him. If he looks at a similar ring and they want 4800, then he'll know it's too high.

 

[ukwizard]

Originally posted by BankerCat12:
For insurance purposes, I had to have all my jewelry appraised so took it to Gumer's here in Louisville. Appraised for twice as much as I bought it for...every piece. Engagement ring, wedding ring, diamond earrings and other diamond pinkie ring.

 

[throatpoker]

the smaller your wiener is, the more you need to spend

 

[bradyjames]

Dennis, he did't ask for our/your relationship advice. He asked for help on an engagement ring. You have posted three times and in none of them did you give any advice on the topic. You're either condescending to him or put those down who mentioned how much the ring was at the time. You calling somebody a "dick" is laughable, you insufferable, know it all prick.

How about you give some advice that was asked for or go get pumped.

 

[B.B.d.K.]

My little dime-piece saleswoman at Shane Co. was straight up & told me I was getting a pretty crappy deal on mine and that it was actually worth way less than I was buying it for.

You guys are lucky, shoulda come to catpaw before taking that step.

 

[maverick1]

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:
The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

OP, dude, all joking and smart-assed-wise-cracking aside, this is some of the absolute best advice you will ever hear, and yes, my Wildcat friend, that is a TMFS.

 

[Wodie Sloot]

PTI, you don't know anything about anything with engagement rings. Maybe you should go learn and propose to your awesome live-in girlfriend. It's about time you do.

 

[backbeatcat]

Originally posted by maverick1:

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:
The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

OP, dude, all joking and smart-assed-wise-cracking aside, this is some of the absolute best advice you will ever hear, and yes, my Wildcat friend, that is a TMFS.

Yeah, seriously. No joke. Date for a while and enjoy the hell out of it. Truly get to know the good and bad...it is there. You just don't see it yet. Then take a step like that with your eyes wide open. Both you and she will be more committed that way. 2-3 years maybe, not months. If she is pressuring AT ALL after 2-3 months for an engagement take a step back and reassess what that is about. Insecurity? Co-dependence? Control? It isn't love because "love is patient.." and all that. That stuff is true.
Send me a check for the price of the ring and a thank you note.

 

[starchief5]

Originally posted by bradyjames:
Dennis, he did't ask for our/your relationship advice. He asked for help on an engagement ring. You have posted three times and in none of them did you give any advice on the topic. You're either condescending to him or put those down who mentioned how much the ring was at the time. You calling somebody a "dick" is laughable, you insufferable, know it all prick.

How about you give some advice that was asked for or go get pumped.

Dennis is often not the most gracious poster around but he was mostly right to say what he posted. Just trying to pull someone from a burning building.

 

[bradyjames]

Star, I was setting the trolling bait.

 

[Ron Mehico]

Originally posted by d2atTech:

dennis, you are correct, same guy. wine advice girl, ended up being the perfect girl for me. i knew right away that she was the right girl for me (like in the first two hours). we met each other's parents over winter break (she's from south bend, indiana). she already said she wants to marry me (which is a bit unconventional i suppose). i guess i knew she was the right girl when she still decided to date me, despite my winery nonsense (turns out she is quite the wine expert).

Just two simple questions for you to think about. What would be the potential downside to dating a little bit longer and proposing to her potentially a little after you both are ready? What would be the potential downside to getting engaged soon, and proposing to her potentially a little before you both are ready? Just don't be in a huge rush to grow up.

 

[Deeeefense]

The 4 Cs - Carat, Clarity, Cut, Color that's what the value of a diamond is based on. Having said that,Carat (size) is the most important, and for some women that's the only thing that matters. Depending on how much the women will scrutinize the diamond I would lean towards getting the biggest rock you can find for the money so long as the other 3 Cs are not ranked below average or poor. You can find some really good deals on line.

Diamonds

 

[B.B.d.K.]

.
This post was edited on 1/23 11:56 AM by B.B.d.K.

 

[Dore95]

Dating longer (didn't OP say they were both still in school?) also will give you time to save for an appropriate sized ring, which is important. If you can't afford a real ring, maybe you shouldn't get married.

Look, all the sentiment on here that only a gold digging woman would want a big ring is just BS. Every woman wants a big ring. Call it materialistic, but it's the way people are. Show me a woman who truly doesn't want a good sized ring, and I'll show you someone I and most of you wouldn't want to date. It's like someone saying they'd rather drive a Kia than a BMW and expecting others to believe it.

And, if you live in a big city and your wife (and you) plan on being successful, other women will judge her (and you)on the size of the ring.

 

[Dennis Reynolds]

Originally posted by bradyjames:
Dennis, he did't ask for our/your relationship advice. He asked for help on an engagement ring. .

Oh man, Brady I'm sorry. I guess I'm the first person to ever derail a thread on the Paddock. My bad dude.

 

[UK_Norm]

Originally posted by KyCatFan:
I'm glad I don't have a money grubbing wife to deal with. We were just starting out and weren't going to get into debt because of a piece of jewelry.

This.

I told my wife to pick out whatever ring she wanted. I figured i'd have to save for a while on something expensive, but she picked out a very modest ring and said "if you're going to save, then lets save for a nice honeymoon that we can both enjoy."

 

[IdaCat]

Originally posted by Dore95:

And, if you live in a big city and your wife (and you) plan on being successful, other women will judge her (and you)on the size of the ring.

Damn. I guess I need to go buy a bunch of crap I don't need so people will think I'm successful.

 

[cbpointblank1979]

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:

Originally posted by d2atTech:
so i'm going to ask my girl to marry me, but i still don't have a sense for what is important in a diamond ring. she's still in school and i just graduated in june (first year of working a real job), so we aren't looking for anything extravagant. what types to price ranges are reasonable? is 1k too much for the ring? do girls care more about the quality (hearts and arrows rating) or the size?

Wait, are you the guy who was just asking about wine advice to impress a girl? Wasn;t that like 2-3 months ago? Same guy?

 

[crazyqx83]

Originally posted by Dore95:
Dating longer (didn't OP say they were both still in school?) also will give you time to save for an appropriate sized ring, which is important. If you can't afford a real ring, maybe you shouldn't get married.

Look, all the sentiment on here that only a gold digging woman would want a big ring is just BS. Every woman wants a big ring. Call it materialistic, but it's the way people are. Show me a woman who truly doesn't want a good sized ring, and I'll show you someone I and most of you wouldn't want to date. It's like someone saying they'd rather drive a Kia than a BMW and expecting others to believe it.

And, if you live in a big city and your wife (and you) plan on being successful, other women will judge her (and you)on the size of the ring.

What a tool bag. And I'd rather drive a kia than a beamer so I'm not putting a car payment every 3 to 4 months into oil changes.

This mentality is why America is marching towards 20 trillion dollars in debt. The morons that vote are the same morons that leverage themselves up to their eyeballs to impress other people.

And I don't doubt you about your last paragraph. We essentially live in the antithesis of a meritocracy. If we could liquidate the people with the mentality you spewed in your post, we'd be better off.

 

[AlbanyWildCat]

1. Don't be cheap...

2. Don't go shopping with the lady...

3. Spend all your loot on the loose diamond...buy the simplest setting and let her figure out what setting she want.

4. Don't be cheap

 

[bigblueinsanity]

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:
Two things:

1) I honestly don't understand why anyone would actually say how much they spent on a ring. Whether it's $25 or $25k or $2.5m, you just sound like a dick talking about it.

2) OP - bump the brakes buddy. SERIOUSLY. You met this chick like 2-3 months ago. You knew she was the "right girl" within the firs few hours?

Ummmm, yeah, FALSE. Go watch Gone Girl. Or read it. The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

This. No way this thing should be moving this fast.

 

[Dore95]

Originally posted by crazyqx83:

Originally posted by Dore95:
Dating longer (didn't OP say they were both still in school?) also will give you time to save for an appropriate sized ring, which is important. If you can't afford a real ring, maybe you shouldn't get married.

Look, all the sentiment on here that only a gold digging woman would want a big ring is just BS. Every woman wants a big ring. Call it materialistic, but it's the way people are. Show me a woman who truly doesn't want a good sized ring, and I'll show you someone I and most of you wouldn't want to date. It's like someone saying they'd rather drive a Kia than a BMW and expecting others to believe it.

And, if you live in a big city and your wife (and you) plan on being successful, other women will judge her (and you)on the size of the ring.

What a tool bag. And I'd rather drive a kia than a beamer so I'm not putting a car payment every 3 to 4 months into oil changes.

This mentality is why America is marching towards 20 trillion dollars in debt. The morons that vote are the same morons that leverage themselves up to their eyeballs to impress other people.

And I don't doubt you about your last paragraph. We essentially live in the antithesis of a meritocracy. If we could liquidate the people with the mentality you spewed in your post, we'd be better off.

Let me guess. Your wife didn't want a big engagement ring or an engagement ring at all. Instead, you and she together decided to put a new roof on the house or install a new septic tank. Am I right?

But seriously speaking, my point was only that most people are materialistic to some extent and, in my experience, most women want a nice engagement ring. You apparently think that's the height of stupidity. I'd say you are in the minority.

 

[crazyqx83]

Originally posted by Dore95:

Originally posted by crazyqx83:

Originally posted by Dore95:
Dating longer (didn't OP say they were both still in school?) also will give you time to save for an appropriate sized ring, which is important. If you can't afford a real ring, maybe you shouldn't get married.

Look, all the sentiment on here that only a gold digging woman would want a big ring is just BS. Every woman wants a big ring. Call it materialistic, but it's the way people are. Show me a woman who truly doesn't want a good sized ring, and I'll show you someone I and most of you wouldn't want to date. It's like someone saying they'd rather drive a Kia than a BMW and expecting others to believe it.

And, if you live in a big city and your wife (and you) plan on being successful, other women will judge her (and you)on the size of the ring.

What a tool bag. And I'd rather drive a kia than a beamer so I'm not putting a car payment every 3 to 4 months into oil changes.

This mentality is why America is marching towards 20 trillion dollars in debt. The morons that vote are the same morons that leverage themselves up to their eyeballs to impress other people.

And I don't doubt you about your last paragraph. We essentially live in the antithesis of a meritocracy. If we could liquidate the people with the mentality you spewed in your post, we'd be better off.

Let me guess. Your wife didn't want a big engagement ring or an engagement ring at all. Instead, you and she together decided to put a new roof on the house or install a new septic tank. Am I right?

But seriously speaking, my point was only that most people are materialistic to some extent and, in my experience, most women want a nice engagement ring. You apparently think that's the height of stupidity. I'd say you are in the minority.

I got engaged a year before I graduated college. I paid like 16th months worth of "salary."

People are materialistic. Welcome to Idiocracy.

 

[UKBlueBlood]

Originally posted by d2atTech:
so i'm going to ask my girl to marry me, but i still don't have a sense for what is important in a diamond ring. she's still in school and i just graduated in june (first year of working a real job), so we aren't looking for anything extravagant. what types to price ranges are reasonable? is 1k too much for the ring? do girls care more about the quality (hearts and arrows rating) or the size?

OP... there's now way in hell I'm going to read 3 pages of responses to this thread. So I'm just going to reply to you and get straight the point, and if this has already been said then so be it.

Forget what anyone says you have to do and buy what you and your future fiance like and are comfortable paying for. Because if there is one truth related to this subject, no matter what you buy there is always, ALWAYS, going to be someone (friends, family, in-laws, coworkers, etc.) who thinks you're a complete idiot because you either:

A. Spent too little on a ring with a diamond that's too small/not high enough clarity/not good enough color/too many flaws/etc.

OR

B. Spent too much on a ring with an unnecessarily large diamond that is overpriced for clarity/cut/color/etc.

In fact, different people will come to both of these conclusions about the same ring. So get what you like and screw everyone else, unless of course they would like to contribute to your ring purchasing fund.

 

[ukalumni00]

JMO, talk to the best friend about the ring. Most times she has told her best friend what type of ring she likes or the friend can find out without revealing much.

In my case, my wife's friend went shopping with her one day and took her to a jewelry store just to mess around. They both sized their ring finger so I now had her exact size. I then worked with her friend on the design as she knew exactly what she wanted.

Taking her shopping before proposing (to me) makes no sense and spoils the moment.

Do not let a woman's BS fool you. Every woman dreams of getting an engagement ring. Its understandable not everyone can afford the nicest ones, but she at least expects an adequate ring. You are going to be very hard pressed to find an adequate one under $1k. I am not a jewelry expert but I have to think anything over $2500 is adequate if you have a tight budget She knows you are not loaded. She is not expecting a $100k ring. She is expecting some thought into it and an attempt to go out of your way to buy her the nicest ring possible.

I paid $10k for her ring. I tossed and turned several nights over it. However, it was exactly what she had always wanted. It was not cheap but it was also not ridiculously expensive.


Side story: Had a co-worker who paid almost $25k for his fiancee's ring. She cheated on him, they never got married, and he had to go to court to try and get it back. He did not make much money. Took inheritance money to buy it with. Everyone tried to talk him out of it but he was "in love" and refused to listen to anyone.

 

[d2atTech]

Originally posted by bigblueinsanity:

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:
Two things:

1) I honestly don't understand why anyone would actually say how much they spent on a ring. Whether it's $25 or $25k or $2.5m, you just sound like a dick talking about it.

2) OP - bump the brakes buddy. SERIOUSLY. You met this chick like 2-3 months ago. You knew she was the "right girl" within the firs few hours?

Ummmm, yeah, FALSE. Go watch Gone Girl. Or read it. The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

This. No way this thing should be moving this fast.

i think i am going to listen to all your folks advice on not moving on this yet. you are right, i'm moving too fast. i think she expects a ring for valentine's day, but she might be a bit disappointed. i agree with you guys, better to wait to make sure it's a forever thing than get a ring and have an engagement fall through. i'll admit though, i'm pretty sprung for her--can't imagine a better girl.

 

[IdaCat]

OP, the wise solution is to invest in a metal detector and go on a treasure hunt for a ring.

 

[ukalumni00]

Originally posted by d2atTech:

Originally posted by bigblueinsanity:

Originally posted by Dennis Reynolds:
Two things:

1) I honestly don't understand why anyone would actually say how much they spent on a ring. Whether it's $25 or $25k or $2.5m, you just sound like a dick talking about it.

2) OP - bump the brakes buddy. SERIOUSLY. You met this chick like 2-3 months ago. You knew she was the "right girl" within the firs few hours?

Ummmm, yeah, FALSE. Go watch Gone Girl. Or read it. The thing about the ladies, besides BBC, is that they HIDE their real side, their mean, needy, annoying side from you as long as possible. They can do it for way longer than 2-3 months, especially if you all aren't even in the same town. They can actually hide it for years.

2-3 months, especially for an LD relationship is WAY WAY WAY WAY too short, IMO. And I'm right.

Seriously, unless there is some weird religious thing, or a knocked up thing going on - you should take a breather. Thinks this over for a good 9 months to 7 years.

This. No way this thing should be moving this fast.

i think i am going to listen to all your folks advice on not moving on this yet. you are right, i'm moving too fast. i think she expects a ring for valentine's day, but she might be a bit disappointed. i agree with you guys, better to wait to make sure it's a forever thing than get a ring and have an engagement fall through. i'll admit though, i'm pretty sprung for her--can't imagine a better girl.

I did not read through all of the posts before I put my two cents in but it does look like you have rushed into this and think your new approach is a good idea. My wife and I had a LD relationship. We dated for over a year this way. We finally decided to move in together to see if we could get to know one another even better and see if it would work out. It did, but we did not get married for another 2 years.

My advice is pump the brakes and just take this slower. If she is the one she will wait for you. If she has to get married right now run away. Seriously, run away. My wife wanted to get married but she also was very open to waiting to make sure it was right for both of us. Any girl who has to get married quickly is doing it all for the wrong reasons (her other friends are married, she is lonely, wants immediate security, has to have kids now, etc) and more than likely the marriage will fail. She will probably be very clingy or controlling if she is the type that rushed into marriage (much like men who are the same way).

Everyone has their own opinion but I do think living together before getting engaged is a good idea. You will find out more about each other and see if it will work. Like others have said, a woman will still hide some things until she gets that ring on her finger, but for the most part you will learn a lot about each other and see if it is worth moving further.




This post was edited on 1/28 11:18 AM by ukalumni00