Blue Bell Strawberries and Homestyle Vanilla has been crazy good lately. Just saying.
N.O.B.
- Thread starter Mashburned
- Start date
Burnt marshmallows >>>>> Fluff/Cream >>>>>>>>>>>>>>mini marshmallows>>>>>>>>>>>>>> big marshmallows.
Don’t @ me
Don’t @ me
Marshmallow cream on top of graham crackers. 'Twas a staple in young kaizer's snack rotation. My brother and I would go through an entire jar in one sitting every time.
Pretty much figured that particular snack was a part of everyone's childhood. Guess not. Apparently some of you jackals were neglected and abused as children.
Pretty much figured that particular snack was a part of everyone's childhood. Guess not. Apparently some of you jackals were neglected and abused as children.
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Poor @Mashburned, relegated to celery sticks and water for snack time.Marshmallow cream on top of graham crackers. 'Twas a staple in young kaizer's snack rotation. My brother and I would go through an entire jar in one sitting every time.
Pretty much figured that particular snack was a part of everyone's childhood. Guess not. Apparently some of you jackals were neglected and abused as children.
Happy Winter Solstice everybody. Enjoy what little daylight you have left, especially you poor saps in satan’s time zone.
Question: What do marshmallows and women have in common?
Answer: my weiner feels good when I stick it in em?
They both expand when you put them in a microwave?
They both nag you to death to do smores (LMAOO!!!)
Answer: The best ones are big, soft, and white.
They're both good to eat with ice cream .... ('cept I can't eat that much ice cream anymore.)
I know it's Christmas and I hate to bring everybody down, but I just got some very bad news...
We aren't getting Chick Fil A this year. WE. AREN'T. F#%KING. GETTING. CHICK. F#%KING. FIL. A. THIS. F#%KING. YEAR. Seems the local, formerly cool, ophthalmologists sold their practice to some giant healthcare conglomerate in St. Louis and said conglomerate is apparently the bastard offspring of Scrooge and Mr. Potter -- and no I don't mean Harry. F#%k me. I'm at Clark Griswold level pissed. F#%k those greedy bastards. They could have bought me CFA theirf#%kingself, out of the goodness of their own -- now obviously Grinchian -- hearts, LIKE THEY'VE ALWAYS F#%KING DONE, but noooooooooooooo, they'd rather keep their money for themselves.
F#%k it, and f#%k them. I'll just start yanking out cataracts myself. Shit's not hard, you know. I've just always let them do it so they feel wanted. A little incision here, a little vacuum there, and voila! -- 20 f#%king 20, bitch. Those cocksuckers are little more than f#%king monkeys with a scalpel anyway. Surgery is simply 1-2-3, 3-2-1. Everybody knows the real skill deciphering which f#%king lens John Q wants in his glasses when he can't even pick out 1 or f#%king 2.
We aren't getting Chick Fil A this year. WE. AREN'T. F#%KING. GETTING. CHICK. F#%KING. FIL. A. THIS. F#%KING. YEAR. Seems the local, formerly cool, ophthalmologists sold their practice to some giant healthcare conglomerate in St. Louis and said conglomerate is apparently the bastard offspring of Scrooge and Mr. Potter -- and no I don't mean Harry. F#%k me. I'm at Clark Griswold level pissed. F#%k those greedy bastards. They could have bought me CFA theirf#%kingself, out of the goodness of their own -- now obviously Grinchian -- hearts, LIKE THEY'VE ALWAYS F#%KING DONE, but noooooooooooooo, they'd rather keep their money for themselves.
F#%k it, and f#%k them. I'll just start yanking out cataracts myself. Shit's not hard, you know. I've just always let them do it so they feel wanted. A little incision here, a little vacuum there, and voila! -- 20 f#%king 20, bitch. Those cocksuckers are little more than f#%king monkeys with a scalpel anyway. Surgery is simply 1-2-3, 3-2-1. Everybody knows the real skill deciphering which f#%king lens John Q wants in his glasses when he can't even pick out 1 or f#%king 2.
This aggression shall not stand, man.
And if it does, proceed with the ‘Beetus Fondue Death Roulette.
And if it does, proceed with the ‘Beetus Fondue Death Roulette.
Trees and lights? Meh. Christmas music? Maybe. Mistletoe? Sure.
But nothing says "Christmas season" quite like a good ol' fashioned, profanity laced mav rant. Just sets the perfect mood IMHO.
But mav..,I wouldn't be too hard on those guys. I'm sure Trump had something to do with your CFA-less Christmas this year because OMB (Orange Man Bad). And don't forget about those sneaky effing Russians. Plenty of blame to go 'round.
One of you more industrious fellows needs to set up a "CFA Platter 4 Mav" gofundme account.
But nothing says "Christmas season" quite like a good ol' fashioned, profanity laced mav rant. Just sets the perfect mood IMHO.
But mav..,I wouldn't be too hard on those guys. I'm sure Trump had something to do with your CFA-less Christmas this year because OMB (Orange Man Bad). And don't forget about those sneaky effing Russians. Plenty of blame to go 'round.
One of you more industrious fellows needs to set up a "CFA Platter 4 Mav" gofundme account.
I've skipped "denial" and "bargaining" and jumped right into "depression."
Life is so f#%king unfair.
Life is so f#%king unfair.
Seriously though, it's shit like this that makes me f#%king wonder why bad things happen to good people.
Frank didn’t accept Bobby’s constant requests for the blow job.
Ok... here I sit on a bus.
I ate a side salad from Eataly at 12:30 today.
Just rolled out of a bar (10:00), having consumed:
2 Elmer T Lee neats
1 Michters Rye Neat
1 Boulevardier
1 shot Rum of some grooviness
1 shot of Japanese Whisky Coffee grain shit
My wife wants to kill me, as I was supposed to help her clean the house for the arrival for her mother and brother from KY.
Fuhk you, bitch.
I ate a side salad from Eataly at 12:30 today.
Just rolled out of a bar (10:00), having consumed:
2 Elmer T Lee neats
1 Michters Rye Neat
1 Boulevardier
1 shot Rum of some grooviness
1 shot of Japanese Whisky Coffee grain shit
My wife wants to kill me, as I was supposed to help her clean the house for the arrival for her mother and brother from KY.
Fuhk you, bitch.
You deserve a drink or twelve. Merry holidays.
Apparently, she disagrees with my decision. Bitch be lightin me UP.
Merry Chistmas, Funky!
I thought the 12 days of Christmas was a drinking game anyway
I’m on a bus. Not sure of its destination.
Oops.
Oops.
I feel your pain brother, I truly, truly do. Hell, drink some more when you get home.
My apologies for leaving you out @Kaizer Sosay ... you actually made me laugh the other day in some thread. Don't remember which one...(so it wasn't memorable, but I still laughed)
Thanks.
![[cheers]](https://ct.yimg.com/mr/uploads/891/5628.gif "Cheers [cheers]")
...Tis' the Season.Titties. I like them.
If you drink enough you won't give a shit how clean the house gets. Probably means you aren't getting any when you get home.
Game day. I don't feel good about it.
If you drink enough you won't give a shit how clean the house gets. Probably means you aren't getting any when you get home.
Game day. I don't feel good about it.
The bar I went to was called Vintry.
I suggest any bourbonhead take a look at their whisk(e)y selections in the menu linked. The bartender (some Argentine dude) was giving me free samples all night of whatever in addition to the 5-6 I bought.
I haven’t been that drunk since my own wedding.
The occasion was for six of us saying goodbye to a colleague (my best bud in office) for his last day. He left bar around 7:00, but I was caught by the trap of exotic bourbon generosity. Additionally, the person I went toe-to-toe with each mega-ounce of booze was a chick in the office who I can’t STAND.
She’s hot - but such a coont. Terrible human. Condescending, annoying...Solid 8.5. Discovered two astonishingy amazing things:
I suggest any bourbonhead take a look at their whisk(e)y selections in the menu linked. The bartender (some Argentine dude) was giving me free samples all night of whatever in addition to the 5-6 I bought.
I haven’t been that drunk since my own wedding.
The occasion was for six of us saying goodbye to a colleague (my best bud in office) for his last day. He left bar around 7:00, but I was caught by the trap of exotic bourbon generosity. Additionally, the person I went toe-to-toe with each mega-ounce of booze was a chick in the office who I can’t STAND.
She’s hot - but such a coont. Terrible human. Condescending, annoying...Solid 8.5. Discovered two astonishingy amazing things:
- that she likes me
- that she’s a closet raging alcoholic
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Was she a former model? Think I've heard this one before.
Sorry, Solid 7, there’s a new leader in the hot coworker clubhouse. ![[banana]](https://ct.yimg.com/mr/uploads/891/1682178.gif "banana [banana]")
Man, UNC sucks. Pathetic baby blue bastards got nothing to be excited about. No bigs, no guards, no wings. Merry Christmas losers!
Man, UNC sucks. Pathetic baby blue bastards got nothing to be excited about. No bigs, no guards, no wings. Merry Christmas losers!
Yeah but I guaran-damn-tee you that they out-fro any team they play though. So they've got that going for them...which is nappy...but nice all the same.
Not to mention the fact that a couple of those dudes are set if there is ever a My Name Is Earl reboot.
Y’all never answered my question...kooky you’re a chef...
What came first - the mallow cream or the marshmallow???!!
I’ve cheffed up bacon caramel corn, chocolate caramel corn, and peanut butter fudge. Tomorrow is world famous cheesecake, then diabeetus death wish shortly thereafter - all for lil baby Jesus. He died for our ‘beetus. Don’t forget that.
What came first - the mallow cream or the marshmallow???!!
I’ve cheffed up bacon caramel corn, chocolate caramel corn, and peanut butter fudge. Tomorrow is world famous cheesecake, then diabeetus death wish shortly thereafter - all for lil baby Jesus. He died for our ‘beetus. Don’t forget that.
It's official! Drunk football imploded once again during the playoffs.
Congrats, Funky.
As team owner, it is my duty to inform you all that I'm firing my GD coach for the sixth straight season.
That is all.
Congrats, Funky.
As team owner, it is my duty to inform you all that I'm firing my GD coach for the sixth straight season.
That is all.
